Quantum Leap S2 E01–03
2–1 Honeymoon Express
So the continuity for this season, probably not as noticeable when you caught the last episode in May then the next in September. But having watched Sam leap into a woman in a bath yesterday and today he’s a fireman, a little weird. But they do sort of explain it away as he’s been leaping around this whole time, we just didn’t see it. That also helps give Sam more polish, as in he’s used to it all now.
Anyway, we start in I guess a congressional hearing where Al is telling the panel that God has taken control of QL and they no longer have any control over it. So wait, Project QL is a government sponsored program with congressional oversight? Or is this just a way for the show to recap what happened in Season 1 for new viewers? Seems like both. They go over how QL works, what Sam has done, how Al appears as a hologram, how Sam’s memory is Swiss cheesed etc. They still don’t have the opening voice over in place to explain it all for casual viewers.
The panel tells Al they can’t believe QL cost $43 billion dollars. Which, OK. Holy fucking shit. Fair point. That’s a lot of money and this was in the 1990’s! Now they want to pull funding because it’s costing $2.4b a year still. Yikes, I mean seems justified since most weeks all that happens is that Sam helps a small time doctor marry his neighbor or whatever. Not exactly an awesome ROI. That is a shitload load of money for Sam to wrestle pigs and make out with farmers daughters. It’s super weird to see Al as a well respected member of society in his military regalia and not as a weird old creep in pink silk suits and golden bomber jackets.
We join Sam in media res as a fireman, climbing a tree to rescue a cat. So he’s been busy. To be fair to the committee, again, this doesn’t seem like a great way to spend billions of dollars of taxpayers money. Saving the cat, Sam then leaps into a guy on a train who seems to be newly married and about to bone. Lots of sexy sax music plays but here’s Al to interrupt and stare at the brides chest. Newly motivated Al is trying to get Sam to do some actual important stuff, like stopping the Russians shooting down an American spy plane and in doing so, cut short the cold war. Sam makes a good case that a beat cop on a train to Niagara Falls isn’t likely to have the ability to influence American foreign policy. Ziggy doesn’t think this is the case either, and that instead Sam should help his new wife pass the bar exam. Al just doesn’t want his good buddy abandoned in the past with the money tap shut off!
Trains are such an awesome place to set things, I’d like to see/read more train things. It’s 1960 and the lady Sam is newly married to has a batshit crazy ex-husband who shows up at one stop saying he’s going to kill everyone. Her dad is a senator so maybe she can help with the spy plane for Al? But she’s more preoccupied with the bonkers husband, which, fair. Back in front of the committee, Al is telling them that Sam is doing crucial global shit and that this weekend Sam is going to change history by stopping the spy plane. The committee agree to wait until Monday morning to see if history changes. But I mean, isn’t that a bit of a self defeating issue? If it changes, how will they ever remember what it was before? Whatever Sam changes, won’t ever have happened outside of Sam and maybe Al’s memory, so the the rest of the world would have no memory of said events, so the committee would still cancel QL? Or maybe it never gets funded? It’s all very paradoxical. Don’t worry about that.
Sam is telling his new wife that she’s going to pass the bar, go into politics and be the first lady president! She retires to the cabin with more sax music. Of course Al takes this as an opening to tell some gross story about banging his 4th wife on a train. Which is important to reminisce on when Sam is meant to be using every minute he has to influence geopolitical events. Sam consults God about if he should have sex with the guys new wife, and I mean, surely he definitely shouldn’t? That guy in the waiting room is going to feel pretty weird when he leaps back into his own body and his wife is like wow you were amazing last night we did such crazy things. Sam starts being super weird, telling her his real name and how he’s a quantum physicist. To what end? Unclear. Before they can get started, the train stops and crazy ex-husband shows up again.
Crazy ex rambles on about the gestapo and how he’s going to kill Sam no problem because he killed his own mother back in the day. He’s also smoking and European, which signs of a villain, never clearer. This train is really super luxurious. Sam & Al can stroll down the isles side by side and still have space to gesticulate. Nobody really seems to notice Sam yelling at an invisible man, barely even a glance as he screams at the air. Al breaks the news that unless Sam does something big, QL is going to be defunded faster than the police in California. Sam initially doesn’t care because God is at the wheel not Ziggy or the committee but then it dawns on him. He might still leap around but he’d be totally alone, no more Al. This would be their last meeting. Even though we know it’s clearly not, it’s a touching little scene. It also made me notice, wow Sam really grew his hair into almost a mullet for this season, but hey, it works.
The finality of the meeting with Al forces Sam into action. He asks his bride to call her senator dad and help with the…no, wait, her dad is away fishing so there’s nothing Sam can do even if he wanted to. Instead he tries to test her on her law school questions but she just wants to go to the bone zone. Quit it lady! There’s $43 billion bucks on the line here!
Elsewhere on the train, crazy ex is stalking around getting ready for the killing time. Sam is forced to fight him, and toss him from the train, but the dude gets back on in the most insane way possible, laying by the side of the speeding train, rolling BETWEEN THE WHEELS and grabbing on underneath. That would definitely work and not get his body immediately sliced into a million tiny pieces. Sam’s wife, just looked her up, she pretty much did nothing else apart from this & a couple of other episodes of TV, but hey she was once married to Josh Brolin. She’s good in this, wonder why she gave up acting.
Immortal ex husband is back onboard (no word on how he got from hanging under the train to in the cabin, but hey, he’s a bit dirty so don’t worry about it) and threatening the happy couple with a gun. He’s going to kill them both! Before he can, Sam makes his move and stabs him dead! Nice one. Back in the future, the committee are reading from a history book to show that hey nothing changed with the plane being shot down, although again, if history had been changed in any way, they would have no idea. If they’re buying this narrative, Al should tell them in the original history a nuke went off. Al is talking about hey, OK, that didn’t work but Sam did save the life of Diane. (ha, Sam and Diane) and talking of Diane, apparently the chairman defeated her for his seat 30 years ago.
Uh oh Sam lost, project QL is over. May as well stay in 1960. But Sam doesn’t know that, so he wants to leap. Between bedroom shenanigans with the guy’s wife, they’re reading constitutional law and Sam points out she got one answer wrong in their prep. And she realizes oh shit, that would have meant I got half my answers wrong and failed the bar! This one little change, bounces all the way to the future committee where now, instead of that old asshole being in charge, just like that he’s replaced by Diane who is now some RBG type figure in charge of the committee in some fairly weak old lady makeup. She OK’s one more year of Project QL, which feels a little bit like a meta commentary on the show itself getting renewed. But wait a minute, so she then has the memory of just after she got married her husband told her he was a time traveler in something called Project QL? Isn’t that a little conflict of interest?
Al does a comedy double take and is stoked. So Al has the same memories of Sam, not the present day? Sam did it! Or wait, Al remembers both timelines? I guess. Sam leaps into a classic image, doing the Saturday Night Fever pose as a lady bends back in a disco.
I didn’t remember how expressly they talked about God being responsible for all the leaping, I thought they left it more opaque than that. But anyway, fun episode to kick off the season.
2–2 Disco Inferno
That’s the way aha-aha I like it! But that is not the way Sam likes it, he hates disco, which is tricky for this leap because it’s pumping everywhere. Makes me recall that documentary about ‘disco sucks’ and how a lot of the push back to how much ‘disco sucked’ was vaguely and sometimes specifically push back against an ‘alternative’ or ‘flamboyant’ or however you want to code, homosexual influence pushing into the mainstream.
A man appears in the disco with a shotgun and oh shit blasts Sam in the chest and he flies through a window and blood explodes and show is over Sam is dead! No wait, Sam is not dead, phew, he’s a stuntman on set. He doesn’t land on a mat because, hey, the director is a jerk! The stunt coordinator yells at the director and they all walk off in solidarity. They really ponied up for the music in this one; Kung Fu Fighting is playing in the background as a disco agent tries to pick up Sam for a music career and hey Sam’s name is Chad Stone which is pretty great. She’s hitting on Chad Stone haaaard, which I mean, fair enough, Chad Stone the stuntman is probably pretty dope. She gives Sam her mood ring but instead of being flattered, in a voice over Sam is in an insane and bizarre rage about how mood rings and the 70’s suck.
On the dance floor Al is of course, doing the hustle, dancing invisibly with disco ladies, going on about edible underwear and hot tubs and being super gross. Sam is really fucking mad about being back in the 70’s. He really hates this decade! Sam’s little brother stuntman is in awe of Chad Stone, talking to a girl about how every girl in the world goes crazy for Chad Stone, but this girl likes little brother!
Ziggy has gone wrong and put zeros on everyone’s paychecks so the whole staff (of lets not forget, this government funded project) has gone on vacation so Al has even less answers than usual. All Al knows is that in a couple of days L-Bro dies. So Sam should probably stop that, yeah? The brother thing makes Sam remember he has a brother! Tom! Of course Al can’t tell him anything about it, and take a drink, because Al says it’s because Sam’s brain is Swiss-cheesed. Of course!
Sam does his best not to hit on L-Bro’s date as they debate the upcoming Ford/Carter election. Sam tries to push L-Bro towards a career in music, in the same way that Sam’s older brother pushed Sam to do more with his life. I mean, Sam holds six doctorates so how much pushing he ever needed is debatable. Al shows up and Sam is shocked by Al’s outfit, which seems if anything, a lot more conservative and normal than his usual clothes. It’s your classic wide lapel power blue number, complete with ‘man bag’.
Sam has to do a stunt where he jumps out of what looks like a super high building onto a big inflatable pad through a glass window and that seems fucking insane and Sam/Chad Stone is for sure going to die. He reasonably panics and clings onto a girder and then eventually falls and there’s no way that can have looked right to use that take for this movie but whatever they say all good no re-shoots, moving on.
Sexy Donna Summer style disco lady is back, hitting on Sam which he takes in order to get L-Bro a music gig. Hey, making out with hot ladies while leaping through time, somebody has to do this tough government job. Their dad doesn’t like L-Bro going into music though, he’s all drunk and like thishhh sucks, kid was born weak, premature so he’s a weak little loser who needs to be a man. Weird.
On stage LB shreds it on the guitar looking like a Tom Petty type dude. Nice! But uh oh dad scowls and tells him he’s wasting his time and everyone is sad. He riles up L-Bro enough that he socks him in the mouth. Fair enough. Sam finally gets a memory back but it’s a sad one. The reason he doesn’t like this brotherly love leap is because he remembers, his brother, died in Vietnam. Poor ole Tom. Al shows Sam a picture even though it’s against the rules, which is a nice little bonding moment for them.
The climactic stunt that might kill L-Bro rolls around and Sam manages to save him. It was the fault of that rascally director from the opening scene! Chad Stone’s dad knocks out the director and feels bad now that he made L-Bro do stunts instead of music. But dad still isn’t convinced. Sam has one last trick to sway him. Claiming to know the future, Al tells him that Ford is going to fall down the stairs when coming off the plane. Sam tells the family Ford will fall, betting L-Bro’s future on it. When he does, the dad is like, OK sure, you proved you know the future, that was a binding legal contract, L-Bro can do music. Which sure, that makes sense and was another great use of billions of dollars.
2–3 The Americanization Of Machiko
Sam is getting off a bus in a reeeal cute little navy outfit with the white hat and wow his hair is really long and blonde. He works out he’s in Oakcreek Ohio, 1953 and has just shipped home from Japan. And oh boy! He forgot his new wife who he’s oblivious too, and who was getting off the bus behind him in a kimono!
His old man is driving him home and rambling on and on about what life has been like in the interim, but Sam doesn’t mind, because small town America reminds him of home and his ole dad. Kimono woman is wandering around town and getting full on “Weyyylll what in the hell is this!!’ type responses. Back on the farm there’s a girl waiting for Sam, ready to marry him and that’s not going to happen lady. Feels a little cruel that after two years in the Navy God or whoever has robbed the guy of the experience of going home and seeing his family for the first time. Sam is having a grand old time though. Al (wearing a Doc Brown style multiple tie outfit) is not as impressed, basically saying farms are shitholes and everyone should live in Vegas. Way to hate on the REAL America Al, you commie.
Kimono wife shows up and yikes, that does not go down too well. No word on what she thought when the guy she’d traveled halfway around the world with just fucking disappeared when they got into town without advice or apology. Al says she went back home heartbroken and never married again and Sam might need to fix this. But for why? This is worth the incredible power of time travel? To stop one lady being sad? The dad seems receptive to the new girl, but the mom is like she needs to fuck off back to China right now!! Stop making rice and washing my kitchen! The nerve! Hilariously the mom takes the pan of rice and dumps it straight into the garbage. We don’t eat rice in America bitch! This lady is a full goddam maniac.
Sam and the kid’s dad meanwhile are all nice to her, enjoying her food, teaching her to drive, and generally just being normal, helpful people. The townsfolk are more on the mom’s side though, or at least the one guy with a speaking part, who’s only clothes are a pair of dungarees and his army hat. He’s a WW2 veteran and of the mindset that this nice mild mannered lady is effectively an enemy combatant. Glad nobody in America would be so closed- minded about someone who looks different to them these days!
Sam is doing hunky farm stuff, shoveling hay with his shirt off and blue jeans. Here comes Lusty Lady begging for him to touch him everywhere and taking her clothes off and acting like she just guzzled some love potion #9. For some reason Sam’s Japanese wife is hanging out the washing topless (read the room) and as Sam falls off the hay with the lusty lady she runs around to see what’s happening and at that moment seemingly everyone in town shows up and sees her half naked. Oh Boy! So women in Japan in the 50’s walk around with no top on? What? Seems unlikely. Unsurprisingly the mother is not stoked about this turn of events and horror of horrors, refuses to come to the town picnic with them.
Lusty Lady is fully obsessed with Sam and may actually be clinically insane, just repeating his name over and over and telling him to annul the marriage and screaming when he’s like dude, I’m married. Get. Over. It. Finally she says OK sure, I’ll be best friends with your wife and help her. And uh oh I’m not convinced she’s going to be super helpful. She slaps a bunch of makeup on the new wife and tells her, remember tell everyone just what I told you to say. Guess what. It was bad! She tells the mayor that him and his wife are fatsos. Ha! But then immediately realizes Lusty Lady is not a good person. Sam scrapes the makeup off her and says fear not, the village picnic is not ruined, we can still play baseball!
During the town baseball game, WW2 dungaree guy is running into second base and clears out Sam. Al tells him to punch the guy out, which, terrible advice Al. Next up, he pitches at Sam’s head. What a card! Remember when Sam was a pro ball player for an innings, channel some of that! And he does, smashing the pitch out of the field which prompts a fight and the guy yelling some racial slur that gets bleeped out of my TV version. Back on the farm there’s a storm a coming, a literal one. Mom is busy screaming at Japanese lady that she shouldn’t bow to show respect (??) and she should go away FOREVER and Jesus tap dancing christ lady will you relax. Japanese woman runs out in the storm, running across the wet road and right into the truck of dungaree WW2 guy! For some reason she decides to get in his truck and then right away is like wait, hmm. He gon kill me.
Sam and his dad go looking for her. Parked in the truck at his farm, WW2 guy strokes her face and gives off mega strong rapey vibes until Al finally does something useful, directing Sam to the house. WW2 guy is rambling about how the Yankees wanted him to play ball but then he had to go to war ten years ago, and never got the chance and now is so mad about that he’s going to torture and murder her, which sure, makes total sense, I see the through line, that checks out.
Sam gets there just in time and fights the guy. It’s a big fight which Sam wins, but the dude threw something at his wife and nearly killed her! At the hospital the mom finally has her come to Jesus moment — she’s sorry she feels bad about the suicide, the daughter etc.
They finish up with a full church wedding which Al even weirdly wears a tux for. I mean, wow, the dude Sam jumped into, he’s really getting robbed of all the best moments of his life. His own wedding day in his hometown! Only the mom still isn’t there. But wait, she shows up at the last minute in a kimono and bows! Huzzah she beat racism! Sam leaps out and something has gone wrong with the space/time continuum on my TV because he leaps into the black guy at the lunch counter from the end of S1. I think that may change by tomorrow.
